Tag: Heartbreak

Tartan Shoes 

I try to wake up early
(But I keep on hitting snooze)
Theres nothin’ wrong with me they say
Its just my heart thats bruised.
So I’ll sink a little deeper
In these post traumatic blues,
As summer leaves start crisping,
Taking on their autumn hues.

There’s nothin’ wrong with missing,
I just wish it wasn’t true,
Each day I check the internet
For some old scrap of news.
I know we all have choices
But it’s never me you choose,
Its always been another guy
Who acts like you’re a noose.

Friends say find another lover
But its never any use
Maybe I should take note
And just cut you fucking loose,
But every time I try to break
My soul returns to you.
I wish I could just understand:
Why’d leave your tartan shoes?

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Dreams

Once again, within a dream,
Upon a street you’ve never seen
I saw your face and heard your voice
I took your hand (I had no choice).

There, into weary eyes I looked,
And read your story like a book,
Though sections still remain unclear,
Yet all I want; to hold you near.

I am

I am.

You do not
Give me
Breath
Yet when
I am
With you
My chest
Fills
With life.

You do not
Make
My heart
Beat
Yet when
You speak
It pounds a march
Which I
Must follow.

You are

Not all
Yet
When you are
Here
I am more.

I am.

—

Without you
My heart beats
To remind me
Of each second
Since you left.

—

Opening a door
To pain
I let it in
I feel it
I know it
Once again.

The Thread

I sit in silence, waiting to be read;
Longing for gentle lips to speak my words,
Yet more that spirit might delve in my head:
Extract elixirs which themselves need heard.
Soft now your footsteps wandering my mind.
What, browsing through my volumes, do you seek?
In asking of the keeper you may find,
But revelation may just leave you weak.
Pages a testament to love which was,
An ode to what the fates themselves arrayed,
For in my living now I still feel loss:
My memories like open wounds displayed.
  Do you recall how freely my heart bled,
  When with your silence you cut through the thread?

Wallowing 

A minute of your time please, if I may?
Soon March will turn to April, turn to May,
And then it will be far too late to say
That what I want is You, right here, today.
But you are gone, I know not where you are,
I seek you in the night amongst the stars,
So long it’s been since you were in my arms;
The space you left, an ever present harm.
I see you in my dreams, such tortured sleep!
Those bitter hours when I no longer weep,
But fall into a senseless state so deep,
That morning comes and goes without a peep.
 To wallow in the pity of my grief
 Is easier than finding self belief.
—

This is somewhat of a throwaway Sonnet which fell out as I was taking notes for something else. The rhyme scheme too simple but yet a reminder of repetitive days and nights, not changing for the better. 

This is the me that I try and fight every day. The one that greives for every relationship which has ended; who struggles to accept loss, who wants to write or message, to just take a moment of their time to say how much they are missed. -A-